It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
