if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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