my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize