once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
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I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
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He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
How naked do you want me to be?
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