i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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