i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
