If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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