I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
