i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Randomize
