It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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