They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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