If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
