i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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