I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
