so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
