He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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