Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
