so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
