you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
