We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize
