You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
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HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Can I color on your dick again?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
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Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
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