Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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