they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
