do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.