what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Randomize
