Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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