In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
