I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
