yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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