$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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