Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
