I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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