summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize