We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
