these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize