sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
