You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
