I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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