i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
