hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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