Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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