I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins