definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize