Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
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