O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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