He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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