Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
