i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
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not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
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When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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