why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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