Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Randomize
