You're completely useless in the revolution.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Boobs are out for the taking
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I pour the whiskey from now on
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
