he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize